So... Wow. I have no tittle.

   This week, I re-read Sold by Patricia McCormic (twice). Honestly I don't even know how to respond to this book. My first reaction would get my blog censored (For curses- don't get the wrong idea, becuase honestly, even though there was a LOT of sex in this book, it wasn't written in a vulgar or perverted manor). It got me so mad, even the "happy ending."

*Hi, there are spoilers there, so go away if you havn't read it- also I'm going to refer to characters by name, so you won't get it. I'm seriously doing border patrol right now, and if you don't follow my requirments GO HOME or go read Sold*

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How is it happy at all? Sure, she gets away after being scarred for life, and having to leave her only friend, the only person who means anything to her anymore. After a year of being a sexual slave, she goes to a maybe happy ending. It leaves me wondering, about so much. We're obviously supposed to assume that Mumtaz was lying about the Americans, and that they were truly nice people who were there to save anyone who was willing to leave. We're left to assume Lakshmi is okay, now that she has come for help from the Americans.

But how do we? How do we know what becomes of Lakshmi once she steps out of the brothel? This book was amazing, and ispiring, but the end is something of which I despise. Almost like a choose your own adventure ending. It leaves you wondering and wanting so much more. I want to know what happens to Lakshmi, and where she ends up after it's all said and done. Does she end up in a safe house, or perhaps on the streets, like Mumtaz promised would happen. When the americans come back, will anyone venture after her, inspired by her courage to leave? Will Mumtaz's brothel be shut down, or will she continue on, paying off anyone who needs to "look the other way." Will the policemen continue to be discusting spine less money-hungry savages who will let anything become of these girls for a few extra rupees?

I suppose you could have a different view of the ending though. You could be glad you're left to imagine, left with some hope that Lakshmi, and all the other girls will be a-okay - but come on, we know they won't- its realistic fiction, not fantasy.)

So I guess really as I'm sitting here writing this, I'm trying to figure out what comes next for Lakshmi. And also I find myself thinking, if this is Social Justice based book, what is it asking from me? 

What can I do anyways?

I feel like this.

When they're like this. 

I feel poweless.

While they have so much power they're nearly unstoppable.

What can I do? What can yo do? How can we stop this alone, when they're banded together- and even still, how can we stop it together?

1 life, 1 planet, hundreds of ballpoint pens

I was reading Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy (time number 3) on the train platform a couple days ago. I was pretty much lost in the book, when some guys I didn't know came over, to strike up some pleasant conversation about "How fiiiine you look, but nah nah nah for me, my fren ova there thinks you lookin niiice girl. You got a boyfreeen?"Anyways, I sort of ignored them completely partially becuase most of that sentence was not english. This, which they thought to be profoundly rude, triggered one of them asked me what my book was about and "why it so good you can't even talk to no body, en gid no loove to the main?" before walking away. Which sort of got me wondering, why was my book so good? And WHAT was it about?
I guess you could say the book was about a man who lived on earth whose alien friend saved him before the planet blew up and ten lead him on multiple misadventures to other planets and in other spaceships with a comical cast of aliens such as Zaphod Beeblebrox, and Marvin. Then they discover the infinitely large planet on which planets are created, get in some trouble with genius mice... and I don't need to go on.
But that sort of doesn't capture any of the wit and well writing. Plus with a story like Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy, there's a lot more. It's like there's a hundred plots, not just one. And to answer why it was so good... There's a number of reasons;

• The writing is so witty
• It's random- but not in the obvious trying to be random sense
• It's never boring
• It's hard to keep up- no matter how many times you read it
• Its So funny- which should count as like 4 points
• It's spacey-futuristic without being nerdy or lame
• All of the space stuff makes sense ^ not like a magical never ending pony lazer beam that runs on tears (I actually read a book with that in it)
• It's So funny
• There are tons of little side stories that are as interesting as the main ones. (Like Veet Vojagig and his quest to find all the ballpoint pens hes ever lost)
• Its So funny
• The names are lame in an amazing spacetacular way - Veet Vojagig, Trillian, Zaphod, and Slartibartfast.
• It's real sarcastic and witty in a deadpan sort of way
• It's... So... Funny

 And of course, it has an interesting main plot. But still in all of that list, I havn't even begun to think of all the things that make my book good... What do you think? What makes a book so good? Or so bad? That's right... I challenge you to think and respond.

No Matter what You're Doing, it's Still There

The book I'm reading is called Wherever Nina Lies by Lynn Weingarten. Its about a 16 year old girl, named Ellie, whose sister disappeared 2 years ago. Since then, Ellie has been searching for that sister Nina. It's about her not giving up, no matter what happens.

When Ellie meets Sean, at a party, the instantly connect, and when Sean finds out Ellie's story, he offers to help, saying;

"There are some things a person just never gets over, that the phrase 'get over' doesn't really apply to. And when one of those things happens in your life, it doesn't matter how much time has passed, or if you're sitting alone in your room in in a party surrounded by a hundred people, and it doesn't matter if you're actually thinking about it or not because no matter where you are or what you're doing, it's still there. It's not just something that happened. It's become part of you."

After I read this line, I kind of just closed the book and thought for a few minutes. I heard the noises around me faintly, and they sounded far away. I felt like I wasn't there, but looking at myself. The way different things have become a part of me, thinking what and where I'd be if my life hadn't gone the exact way it did. As if every single part of me was caused by something else, and something else and something else. It made me think, It makes sense people believe in God. This couldn't just be a big coincidence. It seems so perfectly planned out, it couldn't possibly just be us, living as us, doing for us, all affecting each other in ways we didn't know, by coincidence. I remembered how earlier in the book Sean had said that it was obvious that the plan for them to meet was written long long before the were born.

This idea is so old, and so new. I've before thought to myself if I was making my own choices, or if someone else was. If I was controlled by myself, or just someone's puppet. I fantasized, maybe I was the character in a book. (Then I stopped thinking about that, hoping my book was one with a happy ending.) The idea of myself not knowing what my future is, but someone else knowing, someone else deciding who I'll meet and what I'll do and the promises I'll make, the ones i keep and the ones I don't, kind of disturbed me. If there is a God or a puppet-masterI hope he has what's best for me in mind.

I read on after a few more moments, but as I read, I thought about this character in this book, her motives, her reasons for what she does and what shes done. How Nina's disappearance affected. How she may be wondering whether her desicions are her own. Whether Sean realy truly believes in fate and destiny and all things corny, and believes that that is the true reason he met Ellie. What makes their connection so true, if its just a scripted scene in a play. If we're all actors in a pre-written story, is there any point to live it. Many people have said that they'd prefer death to life without freedom, but according to this idea, we really have no freedom. Or if we should just enjoy what we have- which is a world as close to freedom for many as it will get, and think not of this until it truly matters.

I think this book is playing with these ideas, ideas of people, and the choices they make, and what makes them make these choices, and if they really make them at all and the worlds just one big coincidence, of it maybe, some one else, somewhere else is calling the shots.

A letter to things that completely irratate me.

Dear Things,

I have noticed lately many of you have required a completely irritating demeanor. I would just like to call some of you out on it, so you know where we stand.

Clips. (For hair, paper and other things)
The first thing: You have a obnoxious tendency to get lost very easily. Though there is a impossibly huge number of you in the world, I find myself constantly buying more of you. Instead of falling on the ground and disappearing, perhaps you could stay in my hair, or on my paper.
Another thing: Why are you never big enough to hold what i need to? As hard as I may pull you open and clip you down, you're completely unable to contain more than 2 strands of hair or 3 papers. It seems as if your rather useless if you can do that
A specific note to binder clips
(the large black ones)
I strain my fingers over and over trying to open you by pushing down on your stupidly shaped metal wings. Well no more. If i really wanted, i could use staples. Or tape. If i was really desperate, a rubber band. Are you losing your job security? You should be. You could easily be replaced. Think about that.

More obnoxious things later, I need a nap.

Fade

I just finished Fade by Lisa McMann. Its a fantasy book, or so i think. Its the kind of book that is so welll written it seems that it could be real life. I didn't really realise untill right now that it WASN'T realistic fiction. Its a short book, the sequel to Wake, about a girl named Janie who can slip into other peoples dreams. Did i say can? Is forced to everytiem someone in the same room as her falls asleep. SHe tumbles out of her world into theirs. And, she has the power to help, to fix nightmares, give the dreamer a change. But more than it beign about that, its about her live for her boyfriend, and whether he can move past all the side affects of her abilities.

Cabel (her boyfriend) claims hell love her froever, but Janies not so sure. She knows he loves her now, but she also knows in a few years everything could change. This brings up a serious question. Can love REALLY defy all odds? I hope so. I imagine thats what we should think, but thats one of those things thats so hard to be sure about. Janie knows that it'll be hard for her to accept the side affects, and she just doesn't know if she can trust Cabel with her heart.

This then brought me to another question. Is there anyone who will actually definately love Janie after it's all said and done? Her mother is a cruel jobless alchoholic, she doesn't know her father, and the only person who knows her secret is Cabel, and her boss. The only place that she'd be safe from dreams is complete isolation, and she's scared that that'll be her pnly option. Shes stuck, with hardly any choices and none of them easy.

It's a really thought-provoking book, and it made me re-think some things I thought i knew. Before this book if you asked me "Can love conquer all?" I'd say " I think so." Now, I say "I HOPE so."

ELA Responce Freak Show

I had been eying the book Freak Show by James St. James for a while. I had read the blurb at least 20 times, a story about a gay, cross dressing boy who moves to some swampy, all-white-republican, play-by-the-rules town in Florida. I finally decided to grab the book on my way out of the library, hoping for a interesting book. I was wrong. This book isn't just INTERESTING. It was as if you had taken the life of this boy, and autopsied it. To be completely honest, I cried. Books haven't made me really just bawl since I read Esperanza Rising in fourth grade. It was easy to guess from the first page that Billy was going to have hard times. But the book wasn't ever predictable.

As I read through this book I noticed again, I couldn't find any Archetypes to drop Billy or his straight (?) love-interest Flip into. The storyline of this book was like a complicated dance. The charecters spun and wove themselves around in circles, back and forth. It didn't always revolve around Billy. Not always, just usually. I don't know if Billy is quite a Hero, but he's definitely a winner. He wins the respect of his peers. He wins in his goal of shaking up the super conservative school. He wins in become a super hero, to him and his few, true, friends.

But no. Billy DOESN'T always win. Because that just not realistic. He endurs 10, good fabulous outfits (at least) ruined, or mocked, hundreds of threats, bulllying, threats he'll burn in Hell (brought on by the Bible Bells, the all christian, faithful students, who tourture Billy in there own religious ways) and much more loss. However, with him he has two friends. One who he happens to want to be much more than friends.

*Here Comes A Spoiler. So You Might Want To Stop Reading Here And Actually Go Read Freakshow*

Then comes the fateful kiss with Flip. I'm not going to ruin anymore than i have to, so I won't go on to say what happens next. I will tell you that i jumped up and screamed when this happened, then i ran around my house in excited circles for a few moments. But wait, we think. Flip isn't gay. He's super straight infamous football hero, known for his amazing last minute flip, in which he caught the ball and won the game. Why is he kissing Ultra-Gay, amazing Billy? *more spoiler that would've ruined my life if someone told me before i read the book.* Don't think: It's love that turns straight boys gay. Flip isn't gay. He abandons Billy there, and they hardly ever talk again through the book. This is where I cried. Hard. I felt myself being Billy. Right when I let my guard down and finally kiss Flip, he leaves. Until this point, Flip was my Hero. But now. Not so much. It just goes to show, good stories dont let any character fall into and archetype. Except maybe shapeshifter...

Its Definitley Fall...

It's the most unsurpassed time of the year. Its full of inspiration people seem to just ignore it, pretend its just there. Consider it just a bridge between seasons, and not one worth look out on. We dont apreciate the way the sun shines down, but doesnt redden out skin. The way the clouds crowd in the sky jut so. The chilly rainy days that can inspire whole novels, and the beatiful warmer days, that can inspire life. In fall, sure we talk about leaves, the green ones, the red ones, the orangey colors splashing about playfully on treetops, lighting the whole city on fire, casting a brighter glow than the sun. But honestly. Leaves aren't enough to define a whole season. You can say you don't like Fall, or leaves, but its my prefered season. None can ever compare. Ever. Were leaving behind those sweltering days, and as the wind blows it brings in a bit of chill. We can wear our sweaters, but we don't yet need our heavy down coats. We can snuggle under a blanket, or go outside and enjoy the weather. its the absolute perfect time of year, if not at least compromise between all 4 seasons. And it gives us so much to write about. I just can't understand how we don't apreciate this perfect time of year.